In life, one of the most disastrous steps virtually all humans make is that they seek the acceptance or approval of others. In their pursuit of this, they make wrong turn after wrong turn. Not only that but they also fail to act on some of the most obvious opportunities because they fear what others will think of them.
Right from the cradle, we seek the approval of our parents as this is the way we get life-preserving resources, i.e. we get fed. We also seek to fit in with the herd so we avoid anything that makes us look different and stand out.
Then some of us as we get a bit older start to rebel… But then one too many mistakes and a risk to our livelihood means we are back to conforming and seeking approval, or just not to get noticed by others.
I could write a book on all of the problems people create for themselves, but these are just a few examples of hundreds I could provide about dysfunctional thinking. None of this seeking approval or acceptance is of any use unless there is a direct benefit to you to do so. However, just because it is of no use hasn’t stopped it being a primary concern to nearly every person on the planet…
An example of where the acceptance of others is useful is like a time when you need a bank loan. Don’t go to the bank in shorts and a Bermuda shirt and ask for a huge loan from a guy who’s been a conformist his entire life… Took me 3 rejections before I learnt not to rub the bank manager’s face in the fact that I didn’t have to fit in!
Acceptance of others has led you to maybe feeling like a rabbit in the headlights or an angry rabbit. You don’t know why you are angry, you just know you are angry with your life situation and want to not be angry anymore.
So you seek to take this anger out on those around you. Your anger is just masking the deep frustration you have with living an unfulfilled life. And the primary reason for living an unfulfilled life is that people don’t know what they want, so they go and do a job which they dislike.
They did not plan the job, they just stumbled into it out of need… This is herd mentality thinking. You instinctively know you’ve made a mistake but your mind doesn’t help you figure out what to do as your mind only has your worldly experiences to go on. And those experiences tell it that you should be happy that you have work…
You are alive and living right now, you should be happy yes, but your life should and must be fulfilling for your wellbeing.
Your primary work in life is not your work, it is figuring out what you want to do with your life. People give more attention to figuring out how to get home in a rush hour than they do to planning out their life.
So if you do not already know you are in the wrong job then here is a simple career test which will reveal some of the telltale signs which show you where you are in the wrong job and what to do if you are.
Simple ‘Wake Up’ Career Test
1. Any Excuse Would Have You Changing Jobs
You’re at that point where the only factor keeping you in your current job is that the money you get is almost certainly more than the money you would get elsewhere.
This is like a prison sentence and it is just a matter of time until the company needs cutbacks and the most lethargic and highest paid employees will be the ones for the chop. That’s the bad financial news, the bad news for you is much worse.
You only have this life and life is too short to be spent in unfulfilling work so it is time for a career change. Success will never find a deeply unhappy person, unfulfilled person. You have to go and find success, and success starts with you being all you can be in your job right now whilst you are working diligently on changing careers or starting your own business.
Whatever you are going to do, do what you are currently doing exceptionally well. I teach a technique in the book Creating A Bug Free Mind which allows you to be happy right now in any situation.
2. The Weekends Mean You Have Just Enough Energy To Make It Through The Week
In other words, all you live for is the weekends. Again this is no way to live your life as this will continue to keep you in a deeply unconscious state. You cannot create the future you desire from an unconscious state.
If you feel your weekends are the only bit you are living for and you only carry on because of the money…. then effectively you are in a night and weekend release prison sentence. Ask yourself, would the 15 year old you have ever allowed this to happen to them?
The answer of course will be no. Then it is time you figured out what you really want to do with your life as this stumbling around in the dark and bumping into things clearly isn’t working out for you… Do you really want the future that you are currently working towards… That of a deeply unfulfilled life?
3. You Feel Like You Do Not Fit In At Work
Everyone else at work is enjoying what they do. Most people whinge about work occasionally but you whinge about it all of the time. So much so that you have started to notice others avoiding being around you because you are too depressive.
If this is you then it’s a ticking clock, you won’t have to worry about not liking your job for long. Your new problem will soon be finding a new job. Then after that, you will repeat the same cycle as you are right now in your new firm. A new job won’t fix your life, you have to decide to fix your life.
The problem isn’t the job, the problem is you don’t know what you want to do with your life and you are taking it out on everyone around you.
You are damaging their lives because you are going through life without a sense of direction. Fix that and you will both enjoy your work now – whatever that is. And be looking forward to the new job or business that you are creating for yourself.
4. Going To The Dentist Is More Appealing Than Work
It doesn’t get much clearer than this. If you find yourself liking the thought of going to the dentist just as an excuse to be out of work for a few hours… then you really need to get a life. And that is exactly the point.
You may be all grown up and walking around, but you are dying on the inside. You are dying on the inside because you are not really living, you are surviving. What you need is a job or a business which fills you with energy. Somewhere you want to go, somewhere which allows you to be the person you desire to be.
This is work you want to be doing so much that you feel like taking some of it home with you or you feel like just going and doing a bit over a weekend. Not because you get paid, and not because you need to or it’ll be a real problem, but just because you enjoy it!
5. You Have An Unknown Illness
You’ve been to the doctors and they can’t tell you why you have constant headaches, tension, lethargy and anxiety at work. The doctor says, “There seems to be nothing wrong with you,” but you feel awful.
Sometimes being in the wrong job really can make you ill. You see, our subconscious mind talks to us in feelings. These feelings tell us which way to go, but as we grow older the more we become detached from these feelings. Basically, the noise our egos make (the voices in your head), drown out the whispers that your subconscious mind speaks to you with.
When your subconscious mind knows you are in the wrong job and you are literally killing yourself by remaining in it, then your subconscious mind ‘turns up the volume’ a bit. It does this by making you ill. It gives you physical feelings to make you take notice of the situation.
For you to improve your wellbeing, all you must do is become comfortable with where you are so that you can go and create the life where you intend to be. This sounds like hard work right now, but what’s harder… continuing to die where you are, or going and being invigorated with a new sense of purpose?
6. You Never Want To Talk About Work
Work is a big part of people’s lives. If you never wish to speak about what you do in public situations then you are either ashamed of the work you do, or you are ashamed that you are doing it.
This is not good for your wellbeing short term or long term. Your current work will lead to bigger future problems and so it is time to find out what you want from life and start doing all you can every day to bring that potential reality into existence.
7. Mondays Are Not Just Bad, They Are Painful!
Every day you dread waking up in the morning, but when it comes to Mondays you literally feel like you don’t think you can get out of bed. Now, not wanting to get out of bed is what quite a few people experience anyway. You may be one of them so this may not be a crystal clear sign for you.
But I enjoy getting up early and am always happy to begin the day. I have experienced jobs in the past where I didn’t want to get up and I learnt to listen to those feelings and go and find a new job.
If you like getting out of bed, but are now struggling, then you are in a form of resistance and it is very likely to be a resistance to the job you are currently doing. So all you have to do is discover what you want to do with your life then set about changing it.
8. You’re Bored With Your Job
If your job is boring then your job is boring, I have done plenty of that sort of work in factories when I was younger. But if you are in a job and it should be stimulating, and you find it boring, then you are probably in the wrong job.
Watching the minutes tick away is an awful way to live your life. You are only living this way because you haven’t yet figured out what you want. Do you think a successful person would consider living like this for very long?
Of course not, they’d change the situation within weeks, days, hours, or even minutes. Your job is your springboard to your success in life. You have to get good at what you are doing, or leave and do something else – and then get good at that before you can use your current position to springboard you off to your success!
Do you think that being bored at work is conducive to you becoming the success you are intending to become?
You have to love what you do, love where you are now and use it to get to where you want to go. From where you are sitting it may sound like that’s never going to happen.
However, that is simply because you are not the person running your mind, your ego is in control and it has done a pretty sh*t job at getting you to the life you desire.
In A Nutshell
If you are disliking your current job then it is because you have not figured out what you want to do with your life.
This is your primary need. When you figure that out then you’ll know what to do. The answer isn’t going to get a new job, as the chances are at least 10,000 to 1 that that will be the answer.
The answer is discovering what you wish to do in life and then choosing work which helps you fulfil that desire. This isn’t rocket science but the whole world seems to have forgotten to live their lives with a sense of direction, rather than just bumping into things and living by accident.
Now if you want step-by-step instructions on finding your life purpose – so that you can START living your life before it’s too late and you give up… you need to get my books “Creating and Using A Bug Free Mind.”
You wasted probably one hundred times as much time, energy, money and emotional distress in the last year alone as you would have invested in getting and learning from my books.
Take it from me… I have been in your shoes.
If you invest in yourself and do yourself the favour of getting this education, you can take control of your life… FOR GOOD.
And my books have the answer for you but don’t take my word for it. Read the first five chapters of Creating A Bug Free Mind for yourself right now.
If you do just that then by the end of the first few chapters your life will have changed and you’ll see that the books contain the system of change which will work for you.
Don’t listen to the voice in your head that is saying, “Naah! Heard it all before, he doesn’t have the answer… Let’s move on, if you move on you can go and eat something.”
If you just read the first five chapters then I promise to introduce you to the voice in your head which is your self-sabotage. And I’ll give you the techniques to silence that voice…
But there’s a catch… for me to do that, you have to get past that voice now and read the first five chapters.
Get all the details here: A Bug Free Mind Trial Offer
“Successful people are fast learners. They learn fast that getting to where they want to go means letting go of anything which slows them down and doesn’t help them get there.”
“Successful people can recognise their self-sabotage when it shows up, so they are easily able to see past it. Unsuccessful people think the voice is there to help them.”